I hope you are well. I hope you are OK. I hope that I am at least a passing thought in your day to day life now. I hope you remember the things we talked about. I hope that someday we can still be friends. Each day I think. Each day I cry. I cry for the love I had to give up. I cry for the longing I have in my heart. I cry for the future that holds no joy for me. I cry and I wonder how I can go on feeling this way, lost and alone. I cry, with the knowing that I am lost, confused and alone. Each day I cry. Each day I worry. I worry that I can and will not make it. That I will attempt something irrational. That I will give in and surrender to my sorrow, my pain, my sadness. To take the cowards way out, the easy way out, the wrong way out. To write off a world that can be a beautiful place to be. So I worry and hope it never comes to this. I do not wish to contemplate otherwise. The alternative is not pleasant. The alternative is to not go on at all. Each day I worry. Each day I do it.. He hung up in disgust. I smiled, I have been wanting to tell him off for years but was dependant on his income. Now I was not dependant.With 15 minutes I has another web page person ring me asking for the password access as he was taking over the site. I informed him that when the account was paid, I would supply the owner not him as I do not know you. Until them he has to deal with me and my schedule. The client rang back in 5 minutes blasting me for not giving out his information. I let him ramble on for 15 minutes, on speaker phone, whilst I surf the net. When he finally realised I was not listening I explained, I would not give out his account details to anyone but him, because I did not know who rang me, but only on having the account for work completed todate paid. Until then no further changes will be made. An email arrived 5 minutes telling me the account had been paid and to forward the details. I checked my bank account. No payment. I just left the matter for later.Heather.
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